I visited a friend last night that I have not seen for some time and we were talking about my own wedding 18 months ago. It got me thinking and I have decided to write of our experience.
Now, we had a fabulous wedding, all arranged in 6 weeks flat. I purchased my dress about 2 weeks before, and 4 days (yes 4) before the wedding we still did not have a venue for the wedding breakfast let alone a menu. Not to worry, I love a bit of stress. So I booked a marquee for the garden (Bourne End Marquees - fab and really helpful), and ordered a huge Indian take away to be delivered. So the marquee arrived and was erected two days later (filled most of the garden mind you) and I rushed off to Ikea for lights, drapes, candles and crockery. Mum did the flowers which were beautiful and my two sister in laws did my hair and MADE me wear make up (which I don't normally). We had a registry office wedding then back to ours for copious amounts of champagne and curry. I should mention here Saffron in Maidenhead, fabulous Indian takeaway delivered to your door. We only had close family and friends on the day, (approx 30 people) and a party for everyone else the following day.
Now, I expect you are wondering where I am going with this. The point I am coming to is that (I know, I know, I should know better!!) we did not have a wedding photographer. We thought we could get everyone to bring along their cameras and we would have a record of the day. Fine in theory and it may well work for some people, but it is our one regret of the day.
I am sure no-one will mind me telling you that we do not actually have very many 'usable' photographs from the day. Imagine you go to a party and there are lots of snaps taken, some out of focus, some with heads chopped off, some taken from so far away you cannot actually see anyone properly, etc, you get the picture. And I hasten to add, this is not a criticism of anyone and I really intend no offence. At the end of the day, these are family and friends that have come together to share your special day with you, to enjoy themselves, have a nice meal, a few drinks and have a good time. They are not there to spend their time concentrating on whether or not they should take a photograph at a particular moment in time, to check what quality their camera is set at, to make sure that lighting is good and there is not a tree that appears to be growing out of the back of your head. They do not normally have 'high end' professional equipment and they certainly do not bring spare cameras, flashes, memory cards, or batteries in case anything fails. They are not there to do a job, they are sharing your day with you and there to give you their blessing and love. And even with the best will in the world, they will not be there to take all your 'getting ready' shots, your arrival at the ceremony location (they will probably be sitting inside with their spouse like everyone else), they are unlikely to be allowed to take shots from the front during the ceremony, will not rush outside to get those shots of you leaving, and believe me, once they sit down for a meal and a drink they will, rightly so, only want to mix with their friends and family and enjoy the day. They will not be taking photographs of peoples faces and reactions during the speeches, they will be focusing on what is being said and enjoying themselves like everyone else, as they should be. The cameras will be forgotten and no more photographs will be taken until maybe a quick snap of your first dance, which will no doubt be taken from behind half a dozen other people so their heads will be in the shot too.
So thats it, your day is over, you spend months (or more) trying to get all your friends and relatives to burn a disk for you, gather them all together and sit at your computer in eager anticipation. Will they all be high quality resolution? I doubt it. Will they all be usable? I doubt it. Will the white balance have been set correctly? Guess. Will you be able to have your favourite one printed nice and large to go on your wall? Possibly not. Are there going to be some beautiful photographs you just the two of you sharing a quiet moment together away from the hustle and bustle? I would say not.
We had a lovely wedding album purchased for us as a wedding gift. It is still in its wrapper and still has no photographs in it. That is why I ask if you can afford NOT to have a wedding photographer. You won't be doing it again, hopefully. You will never show that same nervous anticipation whilst getting ready, or put that beautiful dress on again. You will never look so happy again, you will never show that same emotion again that you did when you saw your future husband or wife just before the ceremony. Will you ever be able to get all those same friends and family together again? There is only one time you will cry whilst exchanging vows, there is only one first kiss as husband and wife, only one cutting of the cake, only one first dance, I could go on but I won't.
So there is our one regret about our wedding, and some of the reasons why. We have said many a time that we would not change a thing about our wedding, even down to the Indian take away, except that we would have a professional photographer. We talk about doing it all again just to get the photos, but I know it would not be the same for all the reasons above and more. Plus, getting married can be expensive! The dress is in the wardrobe, the food has been eaten, the drink has long gone, the lawn has grown back (sort of) and the party is over. Still, we do have good memories at least.